Everyone who enjoys baseball knows the name, Daisuke Matsuzaka. In the early 2000's everyone wanted him, but the Red Sox ended up grabbing him for one hell of a contract. First off all can someone tell me where this gyroball is that we have heard so much about? if it's that pitch he throws that is basically like soft toss to the batter he is facing, he can take that shit back to Japan and I'll take Billy Chappell or Ricky Vaughn any day.
For those of you who don't follow baseball below the major league level, Dice-K made a single A rehab start to make up for the tommy john surgery he had to undergo because he threw a measly 622.2 innings over the last 5 seasons. Simple math translates that down to 124.44 innings per year. He started 77 games while only winning 31 of those (excluding his now seemingly fluke season of 2008 where he went 18-3)
If P = Pussy then simple math would indicate that Dice-K = P. He was supposed to be a phenomenal pitcher with this great pitch that no one has ever seen before and yet he gives up 2 homeruns, in the first inning, to Wilmington, a single A minor league team that was hitting a mere .210 with 0 homeruns before his appearance on the mound.
I understand tommy-john is extremely hard to come back from, but for a guy the Red Sox paid 10,333,333 dollars to in 2011 plus ridiculous perks such as his own masseuse and trips to Japan whenever he wants, you think he could handle himself accordingly in the lowest class of professional baseball. I mean if all it takes is a shitty made up pitch and an arm that can go 3-4 innings throwing batting practice sign me up, just pay for my beer in between innings and the cab fare home. Who knows, I may just be worth over 10 million too.
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